Don’t Let Others Squash Your Motivation

Motivation is the cornerstone to goal achievement and success. Without the driving force of motivation the world would come to a standstill.

Unfortunately many of us allow others to interfere. Don’t let others squash your motivation and risk the loss of your goals. Often our friends and family don’t fully understand what we are trying to accomplish or why we are motivated to work toward that particular goal. They only see our behavior from the outside but don’t feel our desire and passion.

One-way to help our friends and family to support our goals is to help them understand your passion and your desire for the goal. When others see that you have a plan of action, you have support systems in place, you know what you are doing, they are more apt to let you go your way with their blessings – or maybe just without their criticism.

Remember that others usually just have our best interest at heart. They appear to want what is best for you but sometimes they are also afraid for you and for themselves. Fear enters into the equation when they wonder what makes you better than them – why should you try to attain something better than what they have? And what if you do succeed? Misery really loves company. If they are miserable and you aren’t they won’t be able to enjoy your company any longer. Or worse – they may be encouraged to change and emerge from their place of misery stepping way out of their comfort zone.

There are things that you can do so you don’t let others squash your motivation. You should first be sure that your motivation is aimed in the right direction. Do your homework. Your goals should be attainable. Earning a million dollars IS attainable. But your first goal should be a dollar, then 10, then 100, 1000 and so forth.

Have a plan. If you want to lose 45 pounds have a plan of how you will accomplish this. Are you using a diet plan, support group, online help, or books and education. Are you incorporating exercise, support, diet changes or nutritional supplements. If you have a plan that has stood the test of time with others before you, then you are more likely to succeed and stand up to the criticism of others.

Once you have a plan and achievable goals set out to find a group of supportive people. You can’t pick your family but you can pick your friends. You will become who your friends are. If your friends are poor and overweight without jobs then that would be the path down which you are heading. On the other hand, if your friends are energetic who participate in sports and frequent activities you’ll be going down that path instead.

Unfortunately if you really want to make changes in your life, lifestyle or financial future you may find that you have to give up some of your friends. And you may have to learn how to function with critical family members.

Try to limit your exposure to people who are critical to a minimum. You’ll find that when you listen to critical people you become critical yourself. You start to look at your plans and goals and decide that they really can’t be accomplished. Don’t let others squash your motivation by allowing them to be critical of your hopes and dreams.

Remember to do things that will bolster your motivation instead such as charting your progress, have a support group or goal buddy, and have patience with yourself and understand that you may have some initial failure but that doesn’t mean that you have failed. Make your goal a pleasure and not work and reward yourself for achieving small goals.

Don’t make your rewards opposed to your goals though. If you are losing weight don’t eat an ice cream sundae when you lose 10 pounds. Or if you are building a business don’t spend $1000 on a nice vacation when you acquire your first client.

Another motivation builder is to find your motivation. Some people enjoy using motivational films, tapes, people, conferences or music. Whatever works for you to keep you motivated works.

Don’t let others squash your motivation to achieve your goals and dreams. You’ll be disappointed for the rest of your life. This is your life, not theirs. You live it!

Resources:

PsychologyToday: Motivation

http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/motivation

University of California: Theories and Principles of Motivation

http://www.unco.edu/cebs/psychology/kevinpugh/motivation_project/resources/graham_weiner96.pdf

Anals of Verbal Behavior: Thirty Points About Motivation from Skinner’s Book Verbal Behavior

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3659498/

Encyclopedia of Psychology: Motivation

http://www.psychology.org/links/Environment_Behavior_Relationships/Motivation/

Carlton College: Motivating Students

http://serc.carleton.edu/NAGTWorkshops/affective/motivation.html

Purdue University: What Teachers Can Do About Motivation